While I Was Away

Okay I may not have blogged in the past year, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t write anything as well. There were days when I just needed to get things off my head, and the best way to do so is, obviously, to write! So I used to just type whatever random thoughts floated by, in hopes that someday real soon, I’ll be putting them up on Stochastic!

 

So here we go:

 

 

From the conversations I have with myself…

“Do you feel like writing?”

“All the time!”

“Okay I mean, in particular, right now?”

“Yes, I do.”

“What do you wanna write about?”

“That’s the tougher part. I’m not sure… there are so many things, you know, all vague pictures, loose threads, nothing definite.”

“Well then, let’s mould the vagueness!”

“Since I’ve come home it’s like my life’s in a turmoil, like everything that ever stood for anything stable or definite in my life is gone now. To think that something so small and trivial could have such an effect, I feel stupid at times, like maybe I’m exaggerating this in my head.”

“No way! It’s anything but small; in fact I feel it’s a very significant change in your life. All that was once a part of your daily routine is a distant memory now. Anybody ought to be fazed. “

“But why is it such a big deal? I mean this is my home, where my family is. After staying away for more than three years, you’d think coming back would be a welcoming change.”

“A home where you only stayed for a couple of weeks, a month at max, once or twice a year? I’m not so sure about this ‘welcoming change’. Sure you missed your family a lot back in hostel, but you had become accustomed to that life. And what added more to this confusion or irritation or the mix of emotions that you’re feeling now is the fact that your family moved here right after you left for college so you practically know nobody here, ‘cause you never really stayed here- no friends, no relatives, don’t even know all your neighbours!”

“Yes but it’s been two months. Shouldn’t the condition have bettered by now?”

“Hasn’t it?”

“A little maybe… but not as much.”

“Give it time. And what with you thinking that all this is temporary, all the time, which is by the way true? You haven’t yet accepted the change completely because you know that you aren’t staying for long. Sooner or later, you’ll be leaving for job or higher studies or whatever.”

“Yeah, that is there. So it’s not that bad after all?”

“Not at all!”

“Thanks… feel better now 🙂 ”

 

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